Ketut Royson
Equality for me is a heap of stuff. In a political sense it's about having a government that is proportionally representative of the people it governs - that is, roughly 50% men and 50% women (and of those, a good mix of the cultures it represents too). It's about women and men having the same opportunities to participate and to contribute - in government, in business, in the home. It's about having the same set of rules, rewards, and consequence; it's about having the same levels of freedom (of speech, of movement, of everything); and the same restrictions as each other. It's about valuing each others differences as well as our similarities; it's about valuing the other as much as we value ourselves.
It's not about women trying to mimic men or vice versa, and it's certainly not about undermining mens rights. But it is about bringing them into balance.
The only problem I have with the system you're describing is that, because it's enshrined in law (that the man should be the breadwinner and the woman should be the head of the household) it restricts free choice (because if I, as a woman, am the breadwinner - say because I have a greater earning capacity than my husband - then I would be breaking the law? Is that correct?)
But in any case, you're talking about another culture, Indonesia, and I am loathe to project my cultural beliefs or norms onto another culture.... I've never subscribed to the notion that there's "one right way".
I'm sorry your wife has to put up with privateshead comments when she comes to Australia... personally, I think if a man wants to marry a woman from another culture, or vice versa, and if it makes them both happy (eg they're both getting what they want out of it), well that's absolutely fine by me.
Cathryn.
