Tip 1: Timing.
Timing is highly important. Get in early !! Don't wait for the certainty of a final result when you be the first to take the piss. Be ahead of the game, and sit back feeling clever while the rest of usenet are in awe of your confidence and inspirational reading of a game, *long* before the final whistle.
Mancs face Nike pulloutTaken from the sportinglife website and quite funny....... Manchester United have been warned by major sponsors Nike that a continued lack of success could cost them dear. The sportswear...
Tip 2: Visibility when something goes wrong
Maybe something will not go quite to plan. You may occbuttionally (hard to imagine I know), make a slight error of judgement. Here's what to do.... Steer clear, and no-one will notice. Sit smugly in the comfort of your lounge in the knowledge your reputation is untarnished, and each day your stay away your reputation is growing stronger, as all those people admire your iron will to resist the flames and criticisms. Remember, less is more, and complete avoidance when you've boobed will turn you into a usenet god.
Tip 3: Subjective comments
Maybe your fierce rivals are lsoing a game. Jolly well let them know about it. There's nothing more that rival fans like than having their nose rubbed in it if things aren't going well. Show your hysteria in every word, the more you rant, the more they'll forgive and forget if for some reason you do make a mistake. Make sure you only appear when things are going 100% your way, and avoid like the plague when situations arise you don't really like (use in conjunction with tip 2).
More tips to follow, including Le Dieu's "the basics on the difference between sending an email and posting on usenet", Moog & Monkey's "wild forfeits that will never come to pbutt", and Bernie the Bolt's "usenet and mental health - the facts".
;-)
