"replica" wrote in uk.sport.football.clubs.liverpool on Sun, 10 Jul 2005 12:44:11 GMT:
Here's a few for yer.
===== A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in Devon. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual kopite jokes when a kopite bloke in the 4th row stands on his chair and starts shouting:
"I've heard enough of your stupid kopite jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype liverpool fc supporters that way? What does a persons footballing allegiance have to do with their worth as a human being? It's people like you who keep blokes like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person.... because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against kopites......and all in the name of humour!
The ventriloquist is embarrbutted and begins to apologise, when the kopite yells:
"You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little f**ker on your knee."
===== How do you get an elderly kopite to laff?
Tell him a joke when he's young!
===== A kopite named Olafina decides to do something really wild. Something she hasn't done before, so she goes out to rent her after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating. She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment, there's nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain. "I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape but static," she says. "Sorry about that. We've had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" the clerk replies. "Head Cleaner," Olafina replies. ===== A kopite came home from her first day commuting into the city. Her mother noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, "Honey, are you feeling all right?" "Not really," the kopite replied. "I'm nauseous from sitting backward on the train." "Poor dear," Mom said. "Why didn't you ask the person sitting across from you to switch seats for a while?" "I couldn't," she replied, "there was no one there."
Figo reveals his Liverpool dreamFormer World Player of the Year Luis Figo has revealed his desire to move from Real Madrid to Liverpool. The 32-year-old has one year left on his contract at Real and had...
=====
(c) Quaggers.
-- Moog
WTF am I drivelling on about BTW?
